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  • #26
    New York commented on this a few years back, and I agree with what she said, particularly in the last 10 seconds.



    Originally posted by Aaronsmithjune1 View Post
    Never heard this out of a black man's mouth. This is just what black women always say
    I've grown up around Black men and I've heard it all my life.
    Akini's Top 400 Songs of the 2010s: [385-381]

    The forest was shrinking, but the trees kept voting for the axe, for the axe was clever and convinced the trees that because his handle was made of wood, he was one of them.

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    • #27
      Originally posted by urbanmusik View Post
      It's the same topic. I never said or implied any of that shit.

      Your comment about white women treating black men with more respect than black women was just an example of the disrespect that black women get shown in the world (and was also a sweeping generalisation with no actual basis).
      But they do. Sadly

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      • #28
        Originally posted by TIfan View Post

        Respect??? No darling. Black women have and are lowering themselves just to be with Black men.
        [MENTION=11491]urbanmusik[/MENTION]

        See this comment? Many black chose other racist because the feel more respected as a man. While some are just freeloaders no matter what. That's not the underlying issue for this. First it was other races putting the black man down. Then at some point in the mist of white people steadily breaking black men down, the woman slowly started to lead which left the black man on the bottom with no respect from no one. If it wasn't for black man's swag, man parts and good looks only god knows where we would be.

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        • #29
          Also I hate when a black man get with white women how they let them say the n word. It's being said to freely these days. It's disgusting and I blank on every non black person that use it. The last thing that we had for respect towards us is slowly fading out. I legit had to check a black man Last night for saying cancelling Camila was wrong and everyone should be able to say it if it isn't be racist. This is the dumbest shit I've ever heard. Crazy how calling someone the F word is considered I hate crime in some states yet how many people has been lock duped for calling someone a n?

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          • #30
            Originally posted by Aaronsmithjune1 View Post
            [MENTION=11491]urbanmusik[/MENTION]

            See this comment? Many black chose other racist because the feel more respected as a man. While some are just freeloaders no matter what. That's not the underlying issue for this. First it was other races putting the black man down. Then at some point in the mist of white people steadily breaking black men down, the woman slowly started to lead which left the black man on the bottom with no respect from no one. If it wasn't for black man's swag, man parts and good looks only god knows where we would be.
            I think we're both interpreting the comment from [MENTION=18111]TIfan[/MENTION] differently, which I can see now due after re-reading the original post.

            It didn't read to me as an attempt to put black men down, instead referring to black women who put in a lot of emotional labour and lower their expectations of what they receive in return from black men who specifically don't respect or treat them well.
            late.

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            • #31
              Originally posted by urbanmusik View Post
              I think we're both interpreting the comment from [MENTION=18111]TIfan[/MENTION] differently, which I can see now due after re-reading the original post.

              It didn't read to me as an attempt to put black men down, instead referring to black women who put in a lot of emotional labour and lower their expectations of what they receive in return from black men who specifically don't respect or treat them well.
              We'll maybe if enough black mothers raised their sons up right it would continue on into responsible men & good fathers. Me & my Brothers were all raised up by a good mother and we turned out great. 80% of the time you turn out how you're raised. The lack of attention and not feeling comfortable to talk to their Male sons about anything is affecting our people in the long run Also, I hate the narrative that black women are stronger than black men. It's levels to this and on the Lower level it seems that way but in reality it isn't. Most of them benefit from several government assistance helping them. Take that away and they'll be in the same boat. Lots of black men don't get government assistance because they don't have control of their kids. They don't got good jobs because they're over looked. This whole topic got levels to it. Even colorism started during slavery when they made us think the lighter skin was superior. So yall up here just pretending like black men are just running to white people for the hell of it is ridiculous. This goes back 100s of years.
              Last edited by Aaronsmithjune1; Sun December 22nd, 2019, 01:16.

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              • #32
                Originally posted by BeeBoy View Post
                ^I was shocked, when I visited SEAsia for the first time and saw how bleaching cream was available everywhere. You just walk in a convinient store and there it is, next to sunscreen like it was a basic need item.
                I've also met two girls from China there being a semester abroad, which wouldn't go outside the hotel without an umbrella during the day or stay indoors just so they wouldn't get tanned.
                Crazy what advertisement and representation does to people
                I have a Chinese friend who couldn't care less about all that (she leaves the house in summer, sunbathes at the swimming pool), but her parents always tell her she looks 'like a poor Vietnamese girl'.

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                • #33
                  Originally posted by Aaronsmithjune1 View Post
                  We'll maybe if enough black mothers raised their sons up right it would continue on into responsible men & good fathers. Me & my Brothers were all raised up by a good mother and we turned out great. 80% of the time you turn out how you're raised. The lack of attention and not feeling comfortable to talk to their Male sons about anything is affecting our people in the long run
                  How come no one has called this bullshit out?
                  So the issue is mothers raising their sons badly, because surely the fathers have no role in this.
                  I am the maniac, I am the ghoul
                  I'm in the shadows in the corners of my room

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                  • #34
                    Originally posted by DnBLover View Post
                    How come no one has called this bullshit out?
                    So the issue is mothers raising their sons badly, because surely the fathers have no role in this.
                    Did I say badly? You can buy ur sons anything, feed them 3 times a day & have the Bill's paid all the time. But that's not raising a man. With young black men in lower environments ( I lived it) you have to constantly be active in their life. You need to know what they're doing constantly. U need to talk to them as if they're daughters also . You need to teach them right from wrong until they're grown. You need to teach them emotions. Me and my Brothers had to move to a not so good environment growing up with my mother & the neighborhood was just terrible. Everyone thought we thought we were better than them because we wasn't acting a damn fool like everyone else. But anyway. My mother didn't drink, smoke or club like all the other mothers that made it their priority to do so every day. It was like we was in our own little world. My mother took her time, she talked to us almost all the time. i still remember several nights where we lay around her room floor where she would talk about life, surviving, being men. How she wouldn't tolerate us being deadbeat dads. Even down to sex but not in a nasty vulgar way. She's now raised 4 great men to and I thank her for everything she did. Even though I wanted to run with certain groups sometimes and she told me my ass was staying home. I appreciate that. Because now there's a big difference in the man I am vs the men that had that freedom as kids.and ask yourself this. How many times have you heard a woman say " a woman can't raise a man".. and what I'm not about to do is let some ukmix members that haven't lived in the environment tell me otherwise
                    Last edited by Aaronsmithjune1; Mon December 23rd, 2019, 18:52.

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                    • #35
                      Originally posted by Aaronsmithjune1 View Post
                      We'll maybe if enough black mothers raised their sons up right it would continue on into responsible men & good fathers. Me & my Brothers were all raised up by a good mother and we turned out great. 80% of the time you turn out how you're raised. The lack of attention and not feeling comfortable to talk to their Male sons about anything is affecting our people in the long run Also, I hate the narrative that black women are stronger than black men. It's levels to this and on the Lower level it seems that way but in reality it isn't. Most of them benefit from several government assistance helping them. Take that away and they'll be in the same boat. Lots of black men don't get government assistance because they don't have control of their kids. They don't got good jobs because they're over looked. This whole topic got levels to it. Even colorism started during slavery when they made us think the lighter skin was superior. So yall up here just pretending like black men are just running to white people for the hell of it is ridiculous. This goes back 100s of years.
                      Firstly if we are going to call out Black mothers, where are the children's fathers??? It is noted that Black Americans have the highest percentage of single parent homes. So the responsibility has been placed on Black women when it comes to many. Growing up in Detroit, it was rare that a classmate's parents were still together. Rare!!! It would actually be a complete shocker. 90% of them lived and were raised by their mothers. But I do agree to an extent that there are many Black mothers that need to be called out for the way they did raise their kids. But if we call out Black mothers, we need to call out absent Black fathers.
                      (However, studies have shown that more and more Black men are involved in their children's lives compared to the 80s-00s so there is progression there, but of course there is still room to grow)

                      When it comes to Black women lowering their standards, of course I will never speak for everyone, as that is the incorrect way to have a conversation, but I can't even count how many Black women are literally TAKING CARE of Black men, just so they will not be lonely. Look at the so-called polls that come out on Black women dating and tinder. It is documented that Black women and Asian descent men struggle the most when it comes to dating. I can't even count how many Black men I know that live with women because they have no where to go. Black men are not the only ones who were affected by Slavery. Black women were as well. The real question is what really happened? Black couples stayed together, even during the rough era after slavery. Also, most Black women are not on government benefits. Yes, there are many, but far as I know, Black women have elevated to education and entrepreneurship over the last few decades (just like many Black men). Black women mostly using government benefits is old racism shade that has long be despaired so lets not go there...

                      Now with colorism, of course the racism is the root, but how is there no progression to colorism? How is it that hair texture can be considered "nappy", men can say "no dark-skinned women," and "she's cute for a dark-skinned girl?" Chris Brown can say "Black girls with the good hair" and Former NBA player Gilbert Arenas diss Lupita for her skin tone, and a bunch of Black NFL players with their White wives can say "cheers to more light-skin babies." There was a little noise made but no one was truly held accountable. Had a Black female celebrity said those things, that would have been the end of her and I am sure many would have said "that's why I don't date Black women." It happens all of the time. I know these guys are only celebrities, but the amount of people that look up to these celebrities, especially nowadays, makes it even harder for dark-skinned women. The "ideal image" of Black men being with lighter-skinned women is often promoted by Hollywood and the "elites." Just look at Diddy's 50th B-Day party. Almost every Black male celeb had a mixed woman or lighter women, and the darker women were alone or with female friends. If I impose a question regarding that subject, your answer would be in the lines of "darker-skinned women don't respect Black men" based on you posts.

                      Of course Slavery and racism birthed colorism, but why is there barely progression towards colorism. People can date who they like and please, but when a single group of women are being left out, the self hate continues to win. Calling out the colorist behavior seems to be the only way we can progress. Denying will only make it harder for changes.
                      Diva!!!

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                      • #36
                        I don't know if it's related to this topic but why does it seem like some people make fun of black men who are very family oriented and are close to their mothers? I remember so many black male (and some female) comedians repeatedly make jokes about Tyler Perry being close to his mother (and his mother's friends) growing up. They gossip and question his sexual orientation (because of his high regard of black women and women's rights) while the likes of those with womanizing and misogynistic ways are glorified and are seen as cool representations of men. Also, with Michael Jackson back in the day, everything he did was always made fun of, the way he was soft-spoken and gentle was immediately frowned upon and made fun of, even by those people in the black community. It's just sad to see that. It's like you have to be notorious and rowdy to be considered as a real man, I think that issue seems to be apparent as well.

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                        • #37
                          Let's not blame either black men or women on how black children are being raised when slavery has left a legacy of forced parental absence and kidnapping on the psyche of black men and women. Additionally, government policies afterwards, specifically the "war on drugs (against minorities)", extreme racial profiling, and the prison boom in the United States has allowed for generations of men (and women) to be separated from their children, leaving them in run down neighborhoods with no resources with few positive role models to go off of. I also lived in some rough areas, and it is very easy to get into that mindset that "Oh, they are lazy and don't know how to be positive role models for the children in their lives." But most of them did not have that either, many people were placed into jails in the most legally questionable ways but it was allowed because at one point it helped to end the Black Panther Movement and then they realized they could profit. The way a lot of these people may act may be questionable but there are systemic reasons why.
                          Please Stop the Music

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                          • #38
                            Originally posted by Crackiswack View Post
                            Let's not blame either black men or women on how black children are being raised when slavery has left a legacy of forced parental absence and kidnapping on the psyche of black men and women. Additionally, government policies afterwards, specifically the "war on drugs (against minorities)", extreme racial profiling, and the prison boom in the United States has allowed for generations of men (and women) to be separated from their children, leaving them in run down neighborhoods with no resources with few positive role models to go off of. I also lived in some rough areas, and it is very easy to get into that mindset that "Oh, they are lazy and don't know how to be positive role models for the children in their lives." But most of them did not have that either, many people were placed into jails in the most legally questionable ways but it was allowed because at one point it helped to end the Black Panther Movement and then they realized they could profit. The way a lot of these people may act may be questionable but there are systemic reasons why.
                            WHEEEEEWWWW.


                            This will be overlooked because people just want to continue to be ignorant.

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                            • #39
                              I am also very curious as to the Asian colorism experience. I hope no one takes this the wrong way but I find darker skinned Asians to be very beautiful.

                              Was there a European influence that caused the colorism or was there something that happened that I am ignorant of?
                              Diva!!!

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                              • #40
                                Welp!

                                Ari Leonnix, Teyanna Taylor, and Blue Ivy just proved everything I said. EVERYTHING!!!! The self hate in the Black community is still high in the sky, but I am glad it is being called out! The Vanity Fair editor (Black man) made it very comfortable for that White woman to basically call out Blue Ivy's African features and even brought up plastic surgery. Blue is 7 years old.
                                Diva!!!

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